Getting lost in this work

Hi everyone! This is a two-part email from Michelle...enjoy!

 

 

PART 1

 

FAMILY!!!! Hello!! I hope all is well and that you are having a great morning so far.

Before I write anything else, I have to tell you something, and this is directed mostly to Daddy...but this morning, I had the world´s most amazingly incredibly delicious tamale ever. I don´t even know how to explain it besides, "Holy crap." I didn´t want to eat it because I didn´t want it to be gone. But then I ate it in like 12 seconds, so..so much for that. But yeah, seriously the food here is amazing. And I haven´t had a repeat of a meal yet! Which is crazy if you think about it, because...

I´ve officially completed one month in the field! It´s so crazy how time flies. I think about all that has happened, and time out here just doesn´t make sense. My first week felt like a year, but the weeks after that have really flown by. It´s like a mind game. I don´t know how to explain it. But "el tiempo buela."

Thank you also to everyone who has been sending me emails! I love it more than you know. They are the perfect boost in the beginnings of the weeks here. Thank you thank you thank you!!!

Okay so this week was great. It was really hard, but I learned a ton this week. On Thursday, everyone in my zone had interviews with the mission President. It was my first interview in the field, and I was a little bit nervous about it, but our mission president is the bomb so I got over those nerves pretty quickly. I was mainly nervous because I usually cry when people ask me questions like "How are you REALLY doing, Hermana Scott?" You know what I mean? But it was great. Our Zone leader, earlier in the week, invited us to think of a question that we could ask him. And my question was along the lines of... "I want to be lost in the work and "forget myself" completely. How can I do that? I´m trying but I feel like I´m not totally there." Before the mission, so many people told me to just love the people, focus on them, and forget myself. But in total honesty, that´s hard to do. I don´t think that I have a problem with loving these amazing people, but I think about myself too much. Anyway, President Ardila told me that I should be thinking about the investigators always. When I am studying, I need to look for things that will help my investigators. When I am praying, I need to pray for my investigators. As I´m walking in the street, I´m looking with my eyes but trying to see with the Spirit, if I´m supposed to go talk to the guy, or tap that woman on the shoulder. It´s crazy and it´s hard and it´s amazing and I literally don´t know how to explain it. But that´s what he told me to do. Think of the investigators first. So that´s what I started doing, because  (sad as it may be) I wasn´t really doing that yet. But something that I realized, is that as I´m studying and focusing on the needs of the people I teach, my own testimony is strengthened. I get my "spiritual feeding" too. As I pray for my investigators, and pray to know how to help them, I´m showing God that I´m willing to do what He wants, and not what I want. It´s a process - everything in the mission is a learning process. I hope that this all makes sense. But the point is that I can slowly feel myself getting lost in this work. And I hope that eventually I can be totally lost, because at that point I don´t think I´ll have to say anything about it. So really, President Ardila is the best. And the mission is also the best.

So here´s the thing - my companion needs to go to the mission offices in La Molina, which is 1 hour away from here. So its cutting our time a little short. I am going to come back and be able to write more I think, so until then know that I love you so much!!!! I have more to say but not enough time right now. But I will send more, I promise. I LOVE YOU!!!!!

Hermana Scott

 

 

PART 2

 

Hello again, querido familia!

Okay, I don´t really have a ton of time, but I just wanted to tell you one more thing.

So we are teaching a boy named Isaac who has a lot of problems. He is 16 but he has problems with drugs and a girlfriend who doesn´t help in that regard, and needless to say (in missionary terms) he has a problem with the law of chastity. We work with his family all of the time because the family is huge, and there is a mix of recent converts, less-actives, inactives, and non-members. So we see him a lot. But he doesn´t really like to talk to us, and doesn´t really see a problem with smoking weed and cocaine (or whatever you do with cocaine...don´t judge, I´m just a missionary). We are trying so hard to find a way to make a difference, tell him something that will help to realize there´s more to life, but he just doesn´t really care. It´s really hard for me, and sometimes I just feel so sad while we teach him. It´s something that is a blessing and a curse about missionary work...you come to love the people so much, and it is just so sad when you just have to watch them suffer. You can see in his eyes that he isn´t really happy, but he just doesn´t know what to do. AHH, it kills me. He´s just a baby!!! 16 years old. It is my prayer every day all day that we can make a difference in this boy´s life.

Anyway, life is good. All is well. I love it here and I´m learning Spanish! Last night I talked on the phone to our district leader to give the weekly report on numbers and stuff, and I talked to him (BY MYSELF - big girl!) about Isaac and what we can do to help him for like 20 minutes!!!!! I can´t even tell you how proud and happy I was...our district leader talks so fast you´d think the world was ending and everything he says is his last words. But yeah so that was cool. Everyday is hard, but there are miracles when we look for them. The mission is really the best.

I hope you are all well, sorry I don´t have time to email you all personally but just know I love you more than words can describe!!!! Talk to you soon!!

I LOVE YOU!!!!

Con much amor,

Hermana Scott